Friday, July 23, 2010

Our Hospital Tour

My Babydaddy and I had our hospital tour a few nights ago and it was like being held down and spoon fed lard. It wasn’t anything like I imagined it would be. Apparently it was really an opportunity for them to waste paper pushing ads and sign-ups for formula, medical equipment and makeup (?) on us. I thought I would be able to grill the hospital staff about whether or not there will be someone to tell the Hubster’s family to shove off when they were trying to hoard my kid. P.S. they will. Umm, sold.

Oh and you’ll never guess who was there. Sunshine Ass and her husband, Stank Eye. She had FBed me a few months ago asking if I was going to go to this particular event since they offered it in June and July but at the time I didn’t even have a bump yet so there was no way I was going to look like an idiot in front of all those real preggos in June. So I signed us up for the July event. I know she went to the June event so why she was there again, I don’t know. Probably to stalk me and cheese me off. Bitch. The good news is she’s a GIANT, like she grew 2 ft up (over her husband) and is puffy x1000. Pregnancy does not agree with her. Serves her right from pregnancy shaming me.

We were divided up into 4 groups and as luck would have it, SA and I were in the same group. Fuck. For the most part I ran whenever she got close enough to try to be friends with me. It was super convenient when during the birthing suite tour I almost. passed. out. My face got so red the guide pointed it out to the rest of the group and all of a sudden I was sweating like a pig over a fire. It was horrible. I tried to die of embarrassment but it wasn’t one of my best laid plans, being in a hospital and all.


Oph said...

Oh lord, that sucks! What were the chances of her going again...and being in your group?! Why did you almost pass out??? I am super curious. I am glad you're okay now. Hopefully you don't have to see the obnoxiously cheery lady anymore.

Raquel said...

@Oph- She's pregnant too so I know she's crazy and probably did it on purpose. That or I just get dealt some shitty cards. I have no idea why I almost passed out. It's happened like 3 times before but I always forget to ask the Dr about it.

Oph said...

Kind of sounds like she'd do it on purpose so she could see her newest "bff" Not good about you almost passing out...another one of those pregnancy symptoms perhaps? When's your due date? If you don't mind me asking.

Raquel said...

@Oph- I'd think so, or maybe I'm about to die a horrible, horrible death. Or I'm going down like Shelby on Steel Magnolias, except without the diabetes. I'm due September 18th and it can't come soon enough.

Oph said...

Aw I certainly hope you don't meet your demise! Maybe she'll come early on my birthday which is the 12th :)Though September 18 has a lovely ring to it as well lol.

P.S. hope you don't think I'm a creep for commenting so much!

Raquel said...

@Oph- I hope she comes on the 14th since that is J's grandpa's birthday (and the person who raised BIL Brad) so I can really irritate Brad and FO. I would LOVE that.

I don't think you're a creep, you showed up and participated in the Teen Mom chat and I love you.


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