Thursday, August 12, 2010

Ugggghhh Pregnancy.

I am so over being pregnant. Neither of us have enough room and I’m starting to understand what “uncomfortable” means in relation to being fat/pregnant. I don’t know why I chuckle at all the shit they say will happen to you physically and emotionally in “What to Expect” because it bites me in the ass a few days or weeks later. Besides that, I’m just too impatient and I have to meet this little person like, now.

They didn’t mention it in “What to Expect” and I was blindsided when I was told yesterday but I’d also love to avoid the strep B test. Nothing about anal swabbage sounds fun at this point. They should just give you the option to bring in a note instead promising that you don’t have it and will pass on being violated. Apparently this is not an option and my only hope is to go into labor before my next appointment on the 25th.

I had a talk with the baby and we’re thinking next Saturday for her grand entrance. Preferably after visiting hours are over but if Jillian’s willing to do me a solid and come early I think I would be okay if she came at like noon or something. I’m flexible like that.

12 comments:

Mama D said...

haha I don't mean to laugh because I was just like you but the Strep B test is the least of your worries darlin'. And I hate to be the barer of bad news... but... the test results are only good for 3 weeks so if your Jillian is 10 days late like mine, you have the pleasure of doing it twice. smooches!

Sara said...

I'll shoot for Saturday if you will. Your Jillian and my as-yet-unnamed-son can be prom dates.

I had the group B Strep VIOLATION done last week. I don't remember it being like that with my first baby, but this one was like "WOW! Buy me a drink first, lady!"

Non Sequitur Chica said...

Anal swabbage? SERIOUSLY?????!!!???

Expressions Paperie said...

Hmmm...that's odd that everyone got theirs anally, I had mine done in the front {ponders, what in the hell?!}

Raquel said...

@Mama- That is the biggest crock I have ever heard. Once is one too many times.

@Sara- Definately. I'm going to be eating TONS of spicy food and the other thing.

@KT- Don't have babies. They don't tell you this shit!

@Expressions- Wait, what position will I have to be in for this?!

Expressions Paperie said...

I mean mine was done vaginally... wait am I confused...WTH

KimR said...

Sorry to burst your bubble. If you go into labor prior to having it done at your OB's office, they'll do it at the hospital.
They're gonna swab 'em both. You don't really feel anything at all. They aren't swabbing the inside, just outside where the baby could come in contact with bacteria. Well, they will swab your Brittany, but that's like a Pap so not a biggie. Promise though, no anal penetration.

Oph said...

I hope KimR is right about no anal penetration...she promised. No one had ever told me about that! I'll have to ask my FSIL to get the lowdown. I imagine they would do it in the hospital anyways even if she were going to go early just as a precaution (don't hate me!). September's the better month to be born in, it has the better birthstone...Miss Jillian knows. Sorry to hear that you're super uncomfy, the heat is probably not helping at all.

Raquel said...

@Expressions- I can only assume you would be on all fours for them to collect a sample.

@Kim- Damn, I was hoping to pass. I pride my anus on being unpenetrated so if a frisky nurse pulls any funny shit, I'm suing.

@Oph- We love green so she should come in August since April is not an option. I'm smart, I was born April 28th so I wouldn't get screwed out of diamonds.

Brandy said...

WTF I totally wrote a comment yesterday and it's not here!
My friends have all confirmed that there is no penetration. One friend even said that they just give you the swab and directions and you do it yourself and it was literally touching the swab to your vag and then touching a swab to your but, she said she makes more contact wiping than she did with the swab.

Seriously though a swab on your ass is probably the least embarrassing thing your going to be doing during this whole pregnancy thing!

Kelli said...

Def no anal penetration, just a swab over the opening. No worries!

Betsy said...

Hahahahahaha! I'm only laughing too because I was SO SO SO.... worried about the Strep B test too. Then the nurse came to check me to see how far I had progressed and she did it and I didn't even know. No penetration for me either. My Dr didn't tell me about the test until I was 30 weeks and I freaked out about the next 2 weeks straight. And then it wasn't even anything I noticed. I hope yours goes just as smooth!

 

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