Remember Me?

Duuude. Being a SAHM is hard. I thought I would be hanging out on the couch with Jillian watching The Price is Right and eating bon bons…or, you know, Cheetoh Puffs. Turns out it’s slightly different. Most days I can’t remember the last time I took a shower and the never-ending pile of laundry haunts me. Haunts me. So don’t be mad that I dropped off the face of the Earth, mmk? Just remember the laundry. And this might help...

So, obvs a TON has happened since….okay, since September. On the bright side, I won’t struggle with things to talk about since I have roughly 5 months of stuff to catch up on. Like:

We moved out of the country and bought ourselves a new house in the city. Green Bay that is. Yes, HOME OF THE SUPERBOWL CHAMPIONS. Holla!

Jordan and I still continue to battle over his douche bag brother Brad. You’re surprised, right? He even flipped Jordan off and yelled at me to "Shut up" right before he had to go upstairs to calm down…at a memorial service. For someone who DIED.

Jillian was born! And then I lived with my Mom for a month because who are we kidding, I didn’t know what the piss I was doing and Jordan faked being really sick so he wouldn’t have to help or get up with the baby. I am so on to him.

I am SO not the crazy helicopter mama that I (and everyone) thought I would be. Jillian has had two sleepovers so far. TWO. But I’ve never diapered her butt with a cloth diaper and well, let’s just say makin’ baby food will probably not happen either. Whatever, you gotsta do what you gotsta do to survive.

Oh and my idiot sister is pregnant. She copied me. Don’t even judge and think “Wow, she’s delisional, who thinks people copy them?” She really did and then she posted on FB about how she has to get married because she’s pregnant (like me) and is going to have a small wedding and then go bowling after (like me). I am going to spoon her eyes out. Probably tomorrow. Or maybe the next day because I might not feel like getting dressed tomorrow.

I don’t even know where to start with posts. There is so much to write about. You tell me what you want to hear about first and then I’ll, you know, do it.